IMU

hehe.. i got great news...
the many weeks of worrying is finally over..
i get 2 stay in good old Malaysia :) and... i won't have to move from seri petaling, not at least for the next 2 years :)
oh yeah.. i haven't mentioned it's because i got my place in IMU..
isn't life great? :)

burnout & snatch theivery

hmm.. i just encountered this interesting article concerning blogger burnout..
i'm like, wow.. is that even possible? :)

on the other hand, yesterday while having lunch with daniel and leena we witnessed a snatch thief attempt to steal something...it's almost amazingly scary how daring snatch theives have become.. it wasn't as if it occured in a mamak where there are no walls.. it occured in Bee's, where there're only 2 exits.. moreover it happened in broad daylight
It's the 1st time i witnessed a crime happening b4 my very eyes, so besides it being really shocking, i was also wondering what i should have done.
Unsurprisingly, i also realized what a chicken i am :) my first instinct wasn't to go after the theif but more to duck under the table and hide :)

Ohana

Lilo: Ohana means family, family means nobody gets left behind. Or forgotten.
Stitch: This is my family. I found it, all on my own. It's little, and broken, but still good. Yeah, still good.
Lilo & Stitch quotes from imdb.com

I've watched many movies... some serious, some not so serious, but i think the most profound statement of all still comes from a disney film called Lilo & Stitch:)

In a world where people often get left behind and forgotten, and trust is as fleeting as the passing wind... it's nice to remember the idea of Ohana.. idealistic? true.. but nevertheless, it sure is one happy thought to think of especially when you're stuck at home with nothing to do...
It's nice to have family.. to belong, to be accepted..

tonsilitis??

okay... i must make it a habit to blog here everyday.. not just when i've something to write..uhh, that doesn't make sense rite? i can't blog if i've nothing 2 write :)

mei is sick.. she's down with tonsilitis.. i wonder what's that? apparently she's quite suffering.. so i sent here a card acknowledging my ignorance of this disease :)
i'm rather of the opinion that firls get sick much more easily then girls... wonder why?

insanity

this is absolutely insane...
last thursday the L.A.M.E committee(which unfortunately included me) and some other unfortunate souls gathered to..uhh, purposefully search for entertainment :)
i don't think i've ever laughed so much...i mean, how much crazier can u get den acting out lame scenes from movies with lame lines...and the killer: making prank calls so between ,"Stop scratching my butt while i'm talking" and "Is that mucus or nosehair sticking out your nose," ... we practically killed ourselves.. and i mean KILL ourselves over laughing at innocent church members who would believe that "Toilet King Co." called them up to conduct a toilet habits survey... and that Miss Candy from Match.com wants to date them:)
okay... so we're evil... but it was FUN :)admit it... making fun of ppl is the funnest thing u can ever do or dream of doing :)

Things Fall Apart

Turning and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the center cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.

Surely some revelation is at hand;
Surely the Second Coming (2) is at hand;
The Second Coming! Hardly are those words out
When a vast image out of Spiritus Mundi (3)
Troubles my sight: somewhere in sands of the desert
A shape with lion body and the head of a man,
A gaze blank and pitiless as the sun,
Is moving its slow thighs, while all about it
Reel shadows of the indignant desert birds.
The darkness drops again; but now I know
That twenty centuries (4)
of stony sleep
Were vexed to nightmare by a rocking cradle,
And what rough beast, its hour come round at last
Slouches towards Bethlehem to be born?

William Butler Yeats: "The Second Coming" (1921)

I didn't actually study this poem...but i read and studied the novel inspired by it for SPM...
Thing's Fall Apart by Chinua Achebe.. i think it's one of the best novels i've ever read... this poem is also excellent.
if only i could find it :(...hopefully my photostat version hasn't been thrown away..

(2) Second Coming refers to the promised return of Christ on Doomsday, the end of the world; but in Revelation 13 Doomsday is also marked by the appearance of a monstrous beast.
(3) Spirit of the World.
(4) 2,000 years; the creature has been held back since the birth of Christ. Yeats imagines that the great heritage of Western European civilization is collapsing, and that the world will be swept by a tide of savagery from the "uncivilized" portions of the globe.

When the novelty fades

When the novelty fades,
What once was beautiful fades to nothingness,
The eye grows weary of sights worth a hundred sunsets,
The heart bores of what once brought joy and gladness.

Why do people so quickly lose interest in what once so easily captured their attention. Things seldom give us that sense of wonder that they used to give at first sight.
Love at first sight? Will it last after the hundredth stare of the thousandth glare?
In Malaysia the official term would be "First World Infrastructure, Third World Mentality". Brand new buildings don't stay brand new for very long. Brand new facilities don't stay brand new for very long.
Even in the church...the greatest Story ever told, the greatest love ever shown... does it still give the sense of wonder and amazement it gave when we first used to give..
Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound...does it still sound as sweet as it did the first time u felt or heard it?

When the novelty fades.

Always

It always happens...without fail...ALWAYS I tell u.
Each and every new staff member in Bee's S.Petaling WILL help me to wash the cups=) throughout my entire term in bee's... there has been at least 10 new staff members and ALL of them in the first week or so will without fail wash all the dirty cups... sadly it never lasts beyond the first week... must be something about new brooms sweeping cleaner.
hehh, at least this time i'll be gone while miss newbie is still washing the cups for me :)

"Are you not entertained?"

today i read an article today remembering the death of a certain deceased Canadian wrestling star:Owen Hart, i think...something written there caught my attention.
"Particularly because here we are, still tuning in to the same glitzy spectacle – with a little more concern for performer safety than back in 1999, perhaps – week after week, enjoying it, while the personal price one family had to pay was so great."
"...performers didn’t matter as much as spectacle..."
and then the similarities between the movie Gladiator and real life nowadays struck me, and i begin to think we're not that far away from a "gladiator" type of world where ppl die 4 sport and to entertain the masses...

u think abt the latest great thing to invade our idiot boxes:reality tv. Witness Survivor(where Jenna Lewis was booed after commenting that the friendships made on the show were broken for the sake of entertainment) and a host of other wannabe's...then that all time favorite,pro wrestling(u may say it's fake, but doesn't the fact that you're being entertained by images of ppl being physically hurt say something?)...
has the entertainment industry progressed or regressed? where do we draw the line of what's entertaining? hurt feelings, broken hearts or physical injuries? when are we going to do something like EdTV or The Truman Show?

"Maximus: Are you not entertained? Are you not entertained? Is this not why you are here?"

Worid...

i'm worried... worried, worried, worried... i'm wishing life was simpler... but den don't i always do...
okay.. when i started out this blog i promised myself it wouldn't be some lousy complaint centre against life...
all the same i'm worried... :(

on the bright side of things... it's EURO 2004!!
before 12am last nite i was still supporting Portugal's Golden Generation to throw off the under aciever tag..now, hmm... Spain seems like the better underdog to support...
GO SPAIN!! but then, being fickle minded me...nah... i'll probably go back to supporting..uhh..anyone and everyone :)

T.G.I.F

okay it's way past friday... but the past weekend was GREAT! :)
it almost felt like i'm on holiday..wait... i AM..hmph..
so...why was last weekend GREAT!? because... i met my dream girl;)
okay, so that's not true.. but last weekend was great bcos' i DIDN'T have to work on saturday...and bcos' i could spend all weekend wif church ppl... it's almost like going on camp...ohh, but the early morning waking ups were a real hang over..

on the other hand, i've watched troy..which uhh...wasn't that bad.But, it's just that, that was it...not bad.It wasn't like..WOW!! it's just passable...the action's great...war scenes great...brad pitt's great...mebbe it's the script n the dialogue...that was a slight let down. to put it bluntly: I wasn't inspired.
I mean like, just b4 a battle/fight scene u expect something memorable like wat Theoden get's to say...hmm... music wasn't great too...even Last Samurai's soundtrack is better

title-less

it's Friday...i normally don't feel this good about friday :):):)=)*-)
i'm skipping work tomoro... i hope my boss heard me when i told him so...no, he definitely heard me,i just hope he remembers...

I've found out that the results for my IMU application will be coming back only on the 15th of July... that means i'll probably be working in Bee's till the end of June.
But actually that's not my biggest problem..i think i've decided against going to UPSI to study Math's education, cos' from the prospectus they've just sent to me it seems quite...umm, mundur to say the least...not to mention that it seems like going back to school again, with the malay medium, ikrar and everything.... i wouldn't be surprised if ppl there had to sing negaraku everyday...

The problem mainly is deciding between IMU or Singapore...i'm beginning to think that my main problem isn't that i don't know what i want...it's more that i'm afraid of what will happen when i DO make a choice...hmm...i've a feeling this is quite dumb...no..the more appropriate phrase would be...i'm feeling I'm quite dumb...

I'm beginning to miss Sunday School...i haven't been through a "full" youth class for a full 4 weeks(1 month!!) coming this sunday...but on the other hand...it's way past time for me to be leaving youth class...me, e1, j.feei, william... i think it's time 4 us to go, cos' if u ask me...until we leave...the "newcomers" won't feel at home...

teacher/doctor/road side sweeper?

hmm..
i'm kinda facing a dilemma...i know it definitely won't get better by posting here, but i think it helps when i'm typing instead of thinking...
let me state the problem...local uni results have come back... i'm offered Pendidikan Math's in UPSI(Tanjung Malim)... personally i have no problem with dat... it was my 6 or 7th choice...with my imperfect results of a lesser then 4.0 CGPA, i know that probably i won't be doing medicine in a public institution...
so... i now have 2 choose between IMU(if i get in) or... accept what the government's offering me...or, go s'pore to study n then apply 2 bcom a teacher...
realistically i'm thinking either IMU or UPSI...
the problem is... what do i really want?... i hate making decisions
this is not the first time i'm facing this dilemma of course...i've been thinking about it since STPM ended... it would seem to me at this moment in time that the only person who doesn't want me to go 2 IMU is the most important person...me...
if u ask me straight up, i'd tell u i'm perfectly happy not challenging myself intellectually and just go straight in2 teaching(through UPSI), but there's the alternative train of thought, which includes my parents...that i should fulfil my potential...hmm...why does everybody except me think i'm smart?

Survivor:All "sTars?"

hmm...
i sort of realized sumthing when i was watching the finale of survivor all stars.
Rob was on the hot seat thru out the jury Q&A, taking heat for his betrayal of frenships n alliances to get to where he n Amber were.
There are generally two opinions about Rob Mariano, the star of this season of survivor...not mentioning of course,his 'side-chick' Amber: who took home the million bucks...n how they, or rather, he, since Amber played the part of 'side-chick' to perfection.
Opinion one is my mum's opinion...the kinda cold-hearted point of view:)
"Come on...u're supposed to be the "All-Star" cast of survivor...i mean, haven't u played this game b4..the entire GAME is about betrayal..the only way u're gonna get thru this game without betraying anybody is by voting urself out.So hey, Rob outsmarted u...don't be a sore loser n make him feel bad abt the way he played cos' u would have done exactly the same thing to get to where he's sitting..just dat u're not good enuff"

Opinion two, my opinion...is what i call the "nice-guys-always-come-in-last" point of view."Oh man..u really shouldn't have done dat...i'm sure there was a better way of getting to the final two..i mean at the very least, these ppl laughed n lived wif u for over 20 days in the wild..so what's wrong wif a little courtesy of letting them know before they go? i'm not complaining about u voting them out...it's just the method of doing it"

uhh..by this time u should have realized y i say opinion two is the "nice-guys-always-come-in-last" point of view...the very act of telling ppl u want to vote them out will get you urself voted out...even if u tell them at the very last minute i.e during tribal council...it's just plain dumb :)

but, don't u think it's surprising..the jury who criticized Rob for betraying them, KNEW beforehand this would definitely be coming their way if they chose to play the game(uhh..okay,maybe not Big Tom :P)...they played the game b4...they all HAD been betrayed b4...as they had betrayed others...yet when it happened again to them..they were (i believe) genuinely shocked, angered, and disappointed...
which makes u think about Jesus being betrayed by Judas... n u realize dat just because Jesus knew Judas was going to betray him didn't lessen the pain he felt when Judas kissed him...makes u think doesn't it..

Theoden

Theoden: Simbelmyne. Ever has it grown on the tombs of my forebears. Now it shall cover the grave of my son. Alas, that these evil days should be mine. The young perish and the old linger. That I should live to see that last days of my house.
Gandalf: Théodred's death was not of your making.
Theoden: No parent should have to bury their child.

Theoden: Where is the horse and the rider? Where is the horn that was blowing? They have passed like rain on the mountain, like wind in the meadow. The days have gone down in the West behind the hills into shadow.
*The Two Towers*

Theoden:...Forth, and fear no darkness!Arise. Arise, Riders of Theoden. Spears shall be shaken, shields shall be splintered. A sword day... a red day... ere the sun rises.
[The King rides past his men, hitting their spears with his sword as he goes]
Theoden: Ride now... Ride now... Ride. Ride for ruin and the world's ending.
[He stops and prepares to face Sauron's army]
Theoden:Death.
Rohirrim:Death.
Theoden:Death.
Rohirrim:Death.
Theoden:DEATH.
Eowyn, Merry: Death.
Theoden: Forth, Eorlingas.
*Return of the King*
(sourced from imdb.com)

this is probably the two best quote from the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy...Theoden HAS to be the Best character in the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy if for nothing else but sheer quotability :)

Hope

What is hope?
Last nite i was watching the Thomas Cup quarterfinal between Malaysia n Indonesia...
Malaysia had lost the 1st singles game, unexpectedly won the 1st doubles, disappointingly lost the 2nd singles...and just when all hope was gone, 2 uhh..heroes of sort rose to the occasion :)
It's strange, but as i watched the match between the scratch pair Koo Kim Keat/Chew Choon Eng against some funny named highly ranked indonesian pair, i think i began 2 understand a little wat hope is..
Hope doesn't make much sense.
When ur hope keeps growing, it means things aren't going the way the world thinks it should be going...
Hope doesn't come 2 those in power, or those who are or seem to be stronger...only weak n poor ppl get lotsa hope.
The less reason u have to have hope, the more hope you have.
Hope is conversely related to expectation...heh,in non-mathematical terms... the more hope u have, the less expectation & vice versa.
Hope lets u laugh @ ur own mistakes.
Hope makes u a winner even when u're losing or have lost.
Overconfident ppl have no hope, and think they don't need any.
And yeah, hope makes life worth the living 4 :)
Yeah, btw, K.K.Koo/C.E.Chew lost to the indon pair in the rubber game 12-15 15-13 12-15 :) they still "won" though

i'm thinking i should copyright the name grayblade to avoid ppl like mei stealing
my name...i know it's a kewl name n all dat but, hmm...stealing my nick is kinda like PIRACY!!...heheh, down with all those pirates!!

okay... there's a problem...
u know all the stuff about changing the template... i can't use it...
cos' there isn't such an option... i think u have 2 be the creater to be able to change the template

hi... trying it out

hey bulldog..

SURPRISE!!! :)

thanks for being an awesome fren for the past few yrs.. you're someone i can always depend on and i'm really glad i met you.. destiny? intertwination of fates? who knows? but i'm glad u're in my life..

hehe.. since u gonna stop working soon n have so much free time..

and since u wanted to start blogging, here's a page.. :) hehe.. have named it after.. hehe.. 8tv inspiration.. :) i know u'll luv it!! "SKYJUICE WITH TABASCO SAUCE".. :) You can play around and change anything you want in the Template, it's yours now!! if any of ur frens need a freelance web designer :) you know who to recommend.. yea? XD

other things you'll need/do:
a sitemeter.. an imood register.. edit the about me section.. and links too..

if you need any help, ask yours truly and help shall come forth.. :)

smile always, ntv, 8tv forever..
panda mei.