going home

after almost a month... i'm going home...
heh... i suppose i'm kinda wierd in a way...
other ppl staying further away... muar, ipoh, johor... all leave seremban when the weekend comes...
but me n feng ko whom both are from kl are happy just staying in dead old seremban...
hmm... i was thinking maybe we enjoy the freedom more then we miss the family... heh..
bad huh? anyway... feng ko went back last week... this week's my turn :P... so well... i'll be around this weekend...
think it'll be different somehow...

on other matters...
i handled a testis today... dissected from the body bcos' it had a tumor...
cool huh? it feels... smooth... surgery is fun:)... wouldn't mind doing surgery...
it sure looks like fun after 3 weeks... all the other doctors look like life's hell... but surgeons seem to be having all the fun :)

free

yay!! Dato' Kandar's not free tom morning... which means i have tomoro morning off...
haha... that makes it 2 fridays in a row since we began...
i think we're taking surgery a bit too lax... still haven't really started studying... i mean... yeah, got read up stuff... but... ward rounds now are easy now that u know that u just have to clerk pts... OT, Endo n SOPD is just being there... i mean... umm... ok-lah... maybe it's just me... but there's not much "work" to do actually... or maybe there is and i don't know about it yet... haha...
on the other hand there's a couple of long term projects i've yet to get down to doing...
haiz... have to look out for some chronically sick dude to become my CFCS patient, meet up with Research Tutor to discuss a research topic... finish at least 1 case report and 1 case summary(personal target) by this or next week... got lah work to do.. but... hmm... don't think i'm as stressed out as other ppl... like those in internal med... think it's just a matter of getting used to it hopefully...

but yay!! free for a 3 day weekend... kinda only lah... still have to be in school tomoro a bit... but that's nothing stressful :)

surgery

heh... since i have internet i guess i don't really have an excuse to not post regularly anymore...
haha... right... of course... i can always lay claim to being tired right?
hmm... just got back from on call at A&E and surgery ward... today was better than the previous day i guess...
getting to know some of the hospital staff... talked with some seniors and a surgeon... heh, generally starting to do/learn stuff... instead of walking abt the wards like noobs during nursing week... heh... but yeah.. it's tiring...
it's been a while since i've been feeling tired... so, heh.. i guess that'll take some getting used to...
waking up to go to the hospital by 730(or try to)... come back by 4-5pm or 8-9pm if on call...
well... just takes some getting used to i guess...

here again

yeah...
i'm back... and still alive...
haha... dun know for how long...
but for now... INTERNET is finally on... it took a while... but finally we're connected to the world...
yay!!! but then again... probably it'll be for a while only...
cos' semester really starts tomoro... so, heh... i'll only be free and online for 2 days... including today...haha... but still... it's something :)

beginnings and endings

tommorow... will be my last day in s/p...
it's the ending of the holidays....
and the beginning of the school term...
heheh... beginnings and endings... without one the other cannot be...
i'm looking forward to the beginning

spread the word

haha... spread the word for those of you who don't know...
the legendary m204 has a yahoo space... and it's yahoo! :P...and it's spacious
come join the fun and to keep in touch... its at...
m204 :)... come and be part of the family...

uhh... that is... if you are lah... if not... dun simply simply come and join...

CNY

haha...yeah, it's chinese new year...
that time of year when i get to refill my pockets without taking any money from my parents...
hmm... techinically i do take a bit... but eheh, don't count that lah...
but money asides...
hmm... money asides....
is there anything else?

Happy Year of the Pig/Boar(for the politically correct)/Khinzir(if you want to be nice to malays)/Babi(if not...)

va-what-tine?

today... is valentine's day.. the day of lurrrrv...

right..
most of my friends are mainly single... somehow... don't know why it's so... but yeah, most of my friends are single...
among single ppl i realized there's some kinda "peer/social pressure" in asian/malaysian cultures to act as if valentine's isn't important... i mean, yeah... i'm part of that group too... i don't think we're "acting" that valentine's isn't important to us, but after reading a couple of "anti-valentine's" posts i get the feeling that my group of ppl have this pressure to "not want to celebrate" valentine's...
hmm... maybe its some kinda defence mechanism to console ourselves when we're sitting at home on valentine's day playing maple story... or oblivion... or dota... while even our parents are out having dinner in some dark restaurant...

on the other hand... i think amongst couples there wud be some kinda social/peer/couple pressure to do something on valentine's day...

hmm... there's just no in between group i guess... like... single guys who celebrate valentine's day... but don't have girlfren... actually i'm thinking if can it'd be quite fun also...
fun but not that gud also... something like... the fun of having a girlfren without any of the problems of committment... hmm... best of both worlds?

PRO

haha... i feel pro now...
i solved my first router problem by myself... haha...
of course, cos' i pressed reset, so now everything's back to default and i'm suspecting the networks not secured... heh.. so still need kent's help to bring everything back to secure...
but yeah... i still feel pro today...

vista

i'm currently using windows vista...
critically acclaimed and supposedly next big thing from windows...
hmm... so when i bought my new comp, i thot it'd be a gud thing to get it first..
well, maybe not so... after thinking it over... i realized XP won't actually be phased out until for quite some time more...

and well.. the new vista, partly cos' its so new... has problems...
like compatibility issues wif AVG and other software...
well.. actually my main grouse is that some compatibility issue with the antivirus software causes it to run in background when a scheduled task occurs... this.. irritatingly makes everything slow down cos'... well, antivirus software running in the bg takes up lotsa processing power...
and cos' its in the background... i can't cancel it... making me having to wait it out... atleast for half an hour... well... yeah... and cos' its new... there's not much tech support available online... yet...
i feel like some beta tester that paid 300bucks to test it on his computer and upon discovering problems, suddenly discover that can't go back to previous versions...

oh yah... loading maple story also causes my version of vista (which is 100% ori) to lose some functions... so the past 2 times i installed it to play, i had to uninstall it and revalidate my vista which bcos' of the maple story somehow caused something to disappear and make it.. "non-original"... oh well... hopefully time will improve things...

oh, and by the way... anyone have any idea how to transfer emoticons from one comp to another? cos' my old emoticons are in my old comp... any one more tech savvy than me able to help?

i got tagged~!

ok... so i got tagged...

okok... let's see... what to do...

okay... the rules of the game, as blatantly curi-ed and put-ed here (ironically the phrase "curi and put" is also curi-ed and put-ed here without any concern of right infringements)

Each player of this game starts off by giving 6 weird things about themselves. People who get tagged need to write in a blog of their own 6 weird things as well as state the rules clearly. In the end, you need to choose 6 people to be tagged and list their names. After you do that, leave them each a comment letting them know you tagged them and to read your blog.

ok...
so 6 weird things...

1. ok... i like to say... ok...
2. umm... i also like to say... umm...
3. i like "grinding"... umm... ok, this is a computer gaming term... mainly from online games... err.. it mainly means doing the same stupid thing (killing small evil animals) over and over again to gain lvls... so that you can do the same stupid thing again... go check out the link for wikipedia's definition...
4. err... which brings me to my next weird thing... i enjoy games.. umm..let me make this clearer- games which most ppl don't spend a lot of time on.. like Snake on a nokia h/p... or Dragonfable.. which i'm sure only kids 13-15 play...
yesterday i just started playing Maple Story also... which i discovered... is something small kids play only i think also..
5. i drive a WAX 1662 Mitsubishi Gallant... which is OLDER than me... which is something like the most recognizable car in s/p and IMU... the windows all don't work, except the driver's... you front passenger seat can't be opened from the inside.. which makes me look like a gentleman if a girl is sitting in fron :P... and its now covered in a layer of dust which makes it a bit hard to look out of the windscreen... haha... now THAT'S a car with personality... haha... everyone wants me to take this car to s'ban.. but too bad... i'm taking my mum's white iswara (a car without personality)
6. hmm...oh ya.. i like bottles... i would have taken a pic if i had a digi cam... but i have a collection of bottles in my room which very few ppl know of... maybe one day when i hav picture taking capabilities i can display to the world this weird passion of mine...

okok... now the last thing to do is...
find 6 ppl to continue this chain of time-wasting...

1. fengko (of course... wat.. you think i'd think of ANOTHER 6 ppl)
2. vickie (haha... cos' he tagged you too)
3. daniel (cos' i know you're too free in the office)
4. ashbee wong wencheng (cos'... you sometimes visit this site)
5. christina (cos' you just came back from taiwan and now got nothing to do also.. haha)
hmm.. i don't think i can tag myself... ooo... i know who...
6. debbiedear (bcos' we're all bored together ;)

yeah... i managed to waste 20 minutes doing this post... which i would have spent doing nth anyway.. so... maybe this is time well spent... kinda la...

yay... done

doh...

i discovered a couple of "duh!" things today (including after 12am)

last nite.. or rather this morning i was trying to get the router to work wif kent's help...
after many many tries checking wires, configuring settings... we finally found the problem...
i was still try to dial streamyx when actually the router had alredi done it for me...
when the revelation struck me it was like... "doh~~!!" and kent was saying like... "alamak you're alredi connected... just USE the internet!"
haha.. so that was "doh!" moment no.1...

"doh!" moment no.2 was actually just now... as i was logging in to blogger...
i have been using the new blogger account for quite some time... and i knew i had to log in with my gmail account... in the beginning... or rather until just now only.. i had thought it was quite dumb... cos' then i'd have to log in twice... once into blogger, then the next screen was to log in to gmail... then only i get to the blogger Dashboard...
the it finally struck me... from the blogger start menu itself if i just type in my gmail username and pass, then can get here aldy... swt... luckily no one knows i've been logging in twice every session for almost 2 months(haha.. till now) well... i don't think i'm the only one... i'm sure there are others...

new comp

i have.... it...
after much trials and tribulations...
it is now in my room...
it is good... it is good...
it is...
my new computer!! ^^

was feeling quite noob-like when i just got back from low yat earlier actually after getting the pc... cos' i knew i shud hav checked everything b4 leaving... and last nite i was actually berating myself for not bargaining wif the pc guy, and for getting "tricked" into getting a 290 bucks casing when it could have easily have been 90 bucks... and was quite occupied with thinking how to get hold of an original MS Office... i'm quite broke... and i don't really want to ask my dad for more money to get Office (which outrageously goes for cheapest at RM411 for the teacher's edition .. o_O) but complaints aside... i'm quite satisfied with what i have... would have prefered to have it a little cheaper, but what's done is done...

but i've learnt that i'm extremly noob-like when it comes to buying stuffs... not just computer stuff... i'm the type of guy whom if u tell me any price i'll just take it as it is without asking further... heh, easy to bluff but well... luckily doctors are "well respected"... so in the future b4 buying anything just do a bit of small talk and say i'm dr. maybe will be getting discounts anyway... and then ppl think doctors are smart so they won't dare to bluff me...

yeah rite -_-

just to be

the past few weeks have been kinda weird for me actually...
besides the fact that i'm really free...
some things have actually been bothering me...
ever since last month when i was absent from church for almost a month due to holidays and seremban stuff, i've been wondering what it would be like to live life as a non christian... the idea seems appealing honestly...
cos' among others... i wouldn't have to concern myself with the problems of the church, i wouldn't have to behave in a way as to please other ppl, wouldn't have to care about wat other ppl do, wouldn't have to wake up early on sunday morning...
i'm kind of a easy going guy... i really hate responsibility, and throughout the years when i was president of TU, there were good times, bad times, lonely times... but i always knew one thing..
it was always like wearing a shirt that doesn't quite fit... like doing a job you're not good at doing... cos' the burden of responsibility really weighs heavily on my mind...
so the past month when i was able to "let it all go".. it was really, a relief... i almost swear that i woke up smiling on that first sunday morning away from church...

since then, i've really been considering living life "away" from church...i've been in a way considering "backsliding"... in a way.. it wasn't helped that the first sunday i got back, i was asked to 1. teach in sunday school the following ; 2. play for worship 2 weeks from then ; 3. prepare a coming TU program... heh, so much for church not just being about serving...

well.. to a cut a long post short...
i think i finally found my answers...
i've not decided to fall out of church... in fact i'm think i'm gonna stay on and serve in what ever way i can...
i can't remember what it was that triggered it actually... but as i struggled with this question... i think i realized that we serve not out of duty or obligation... but out of gratitude...
gratitude... my cross may seem heavy to me... but i bear it all the same because of He who bore His before me...
we are called first and foremost, just to BE christian by recieving from God... it is when we realize how much we have recieved that then we tell others how much we have recieved, and we then serve the people around us in whatever way we can because Jesus Himself humbled himself to serve us first...
but i suppose what we always forget when we lose sight of the prize ahead is that we are called first and foremost just to be... just to sit at his feet to recieve from Him first...

driving

heh... lately my sister has been asking my mum, dad and me to let her drive...
i discovered i'm not as patient as i thought...
almost every other time she changes gear i'm alredi thinking...
faster lah... faster...
cut that car...
gear 4, gear 4... then gear 5...

lolz... learning how to sit in the slow seat nowadays...

yay~~~~....

yay... i finally finished the brood wars last mission...
wow... i feel so...
accomplished...
strange... i took almost a week of loading and reloading to finish the stupid mission and now i don't even feel vaguely satisfied...
hmm...
i don't think i'll ever conquer the world... i wonder if evil geniuses ever realize that once they conquer the world they'll have nothing to do...
it'd be like finishing the last mission that can ever be accomplished and then...
and then have nothing to do... swt
why would anyone even want to conquer the world i wonder...
i wonder what someone who has conquered the world do the day after his magnificent victory...

sleep in?

it's up

yes... it's up...
new template... all fully 100% of it, done with blogger v2...
quite cool actually the template editor now... makes things much more easier...
problem would be ofcourse... nth beats hands on html code editing for freedom of adjusting...
but well... i suppose i'll settle for a "normal" blog look... seeing as i'm a tad lazy to edit scripts now...
so... links are updated, some have been removed, some added... umm... now i have a description... kinda lah... and yeah... everything's working... even the history :) (which i think, in the old template didn't work...)

and amazingly... fengko managed to discover my blog whilst it was under construction while i was out for lunch... hmm... ok-la.. lunch was a bit long today, and i came back to sleep after that...

...

after i think 2-3 weeks of hols...
it's official...
i've run out of things to do...
i've also kinda run out of money to do things which led me to run out of things to do...
i've also bcome BORED... which kinda led to run out of money to do things.. which in turn led me to run out of things to do...
haiz.. life is a viscous cycle...
wat to do, wat to do...

heh, i was just browsing around and i posted this in sueyi's blog... which i think quite appropriately describes my current and future(for 1 month) state of affairs...

it's over

it's over...

and like Sam says at the end of the novel...

"I'm home"

almost there

we're almost there...
just a little bit more...
and it'll all seem like a dream...
and we'd have arrived at the end...
the end of the beginning...
before we all move our separate (or not so seperate) ways...

it has been a blessing, an honour and a privelege to have been in the class of M204... some of my sweetest memories have happened in the short 2 n half years that have passed...
i have been reminded especially over the period of this week as i faced EOS5...
that i stand tall, not by my own two feet... but because i stand on the shoulders of the giants around me... my batchmates who have been the ultimate help in studies as we support each other... and my church friends who have been so supportive in prayer throughout this trying period... some prayers came from the most unexpected of people... some, like well made chairs that you know will support you when you need them.. are always there supporting you even before you ask for help... but most of all... i stand tall not because my ability is great or my knowledge is vast... but because i have a good God... a GREAT GOD... on whose shoulders i stand the tallest...

just a little bit more and EOS5 will be end...
and then it'll all be over...
all over...